


Schrödinger's Cat

by cemetrygatess



Category: Star Trek: Deep Space Nine
Genre: Cannon Divergence, Dominion War (Star Trek), First Kiss, Julian Rambling, Late Night Conversations, Love Confessions, M/M, Physics, Sweet, i just love these two, no ezri ok, soft
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-04-29
Updated: 2020-04-29
Packaged: 2021-03-02 01:08:26
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 1,059
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/23906683
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/cemetrygatess/pseuds/cemetrygatess
Summary: On the eve of Garak leaving to join the Cardassian Resistance, Dr. Bashir wants to talk about physics.
Relationships: Julian Bashir/Elim Garak
Comments: 8
Kudos: 110





	Schrödinger's Cat

**Author's Note:**

> Listen just pretend the whole Ezri romantic subplot isn’t happening

On the eve of Garak and Kira leaving for the Cardassian resistance movement, Julian couldn’t sleep. He paced up and down his quarters, he put on soothing music, he hugged Kukalaka. Nothing made any sort of difference. He just kept thinking about Garak leaving, and never coming back. Or else, him dying. Those casualty reports, week in and week out had worn on him. Losing Jadzia has worn on him. He felt like he was gripping onto the present, and all the same it was running through his hands like so much sand. 

When the pacing through his own quarters began to feel particularly futile, he decided to see Garak. It was only twenty-two hundred hours, definitely not too late. Julian walked to Garak’s quarters in record time, the nervous energy propelling him forward. He rang the bell, and fidgeted for a brief moment. 

“Come in!” The doors opened to Garak sitting on his couch in some sort of evening robe, his hair somewhat more untamed than usual. He was reading a padd, the lights were dim. Perhaps it was too late. “Oh hello Doctor, what a lovely surprise. To what do I owe the pleasure?” Garak’s expression looked genuinely pleased, but Julian never could tell. 

Julian put his hands behind his back and walked in, the door closing behind him. “I’m sorry to bother you so late, but I didn’t want you to leave without me wishing you good luck.” He assumed the embarrassment was all too well written over his face. 

“Thank you, Doctor. Major Kira is very capable, and she lived through the long Bajoran resistance. I am somewhat optimistic that things may work out.” Bashir couldn’t tell if Garak was as calm as he seemed, or if he was just trying to be reassuring.

“All the same.” Julian paused for a while, beginning to pace slowly in front of Garak. 

“Is there something wrong, Doctor?” Garak asked, his voice betraying a gentle concern. 

Julian stopped pacing, and looked at the tailor, probing. “Garak, have you heard of Schrödinger's cat?”

“I don’t believe I have,” Garak replied, only betraying a hit of confusion. 

“It’s an old earth thought experiment. When humans were trying to better understand wave particle duality.” Bashir explained, beginning to pace again in front of a seated Garak. 

“Subatomic particles can have properties both like a wave and like a particle. We Cardassians are familiar with this idea, it’s the basis of computing,” Garak said encouragingly. 

“Yes well, when you observe, for example an electron, the wave behavior collapses into a single more particle-like state.”

“So I am aware. Where does the cat come in?” asked Garak, putting the padd down and getting up from the couch. 

“Well this 20th century quantum physicist Erwin Schrödinger didn’t appreciate that the laws applying to quantum objects didn’t make sense in the context of everyday objects.” Julian smiled. 

“Yes of course, this is a paradox many rudimentary civilizations butt up against.”

“So he suggested a scenario where a cat is placed in a box for an hour. In that hour a radioactive isotope has a 50% chance of decaying, and if it does so a vial of poisonous gas will be broken, killing the cat.”

“Early humans were so barbaric!” Garak exclaimed, with genuine concern. 

“It’s not a real cat Garak, it’s a thought experiment.” Julian chided, his amusement enough to halt his frantic pacing. 

“And what is the point of the thought experiment?” His tone betrayed impatience. Perhaps he'd rather I leave, Julian thought glumly. But he'd never let the annoyance of others stop him before, why start now?

“Well be the laws of quantum mechanics, the cat is both alive and dead until the box is opened and the waveform collapses. Or you can think of it as when the box is opened, two universes are made, one where the cat is dead, another where it is alive. But of course to us, the observer, we experience a single outcome.”

“Ah an interesting thought! But why my dear doctor, did you feel the need to tell me about it at this late hour?” Garak asked, nearing towards a somewhat still Dr. Bashir. 

“Just like in physics, in life there are these moments before which many possible universes exist, and after which the waveform collapses. Before I decided certainly to study medicine, there were moments when I considered alternate choices, and so if you believe in that every time a waveform collapses, a universe is made, there are universes where I am an engineer or a tennis player or dead. For example.” Julian spoke quickly, words falling out of him like a waterfall after a hard rain. 

Garak tilted his head to the side, and looked up at Julian pensively. “I believe you may be losing me.”

“Well, there are moments in life when you open the box, and then you have to live in a universe where the cat is alive or the cat is dead.” Garak narrowed his eyes at Julian but let him continue. “And well for much of my life I have gleefully opened boxes, run at all sorts of danger head first. But I haven’t been able to do that with you, Elim.”

Garak took another step towards Julian, the distance between them shrinking fast. He took Julian’s left hand in both his hands and looked up to ask “Why not, Doctor?”

Julian took a deep breath, and glanced down at his shoes. “For awhile now, well I’ve wanted to tell you I love you.” He looked up into Garak’s shocked eyes, and immediately looked back at down and away from their intensity. “I’ve loved you for a long time, but I couldn’t bear to open the box, and find out that you didn’t love me too. I couldn’t live in that universe. So I said nothing. I could never tell if you meant it when you flirted with me. But Elim, I had to tell you, before you left… just in case… I couldn’t, I don’t know if either of us will live to see the end of this war… “ 

Garak reached up to cup the curve of Julian’s jaw in his hands, and smiled fondly. “Doctor, there aren’t two possible universes, there is only one.”

And with that, Garak crashed his mouth against Julian’s, in an earnest kiss. 

**Author's Note:**

> Hope you enjoyed this little one shot. I'm not a physicist so hopefully I didn't say anything blatantly wrong! 
> 
> This scene came into my head originally as part of my longer Post-Cannon Cardassia fic, The Journey Home. But the more I thought about that universe, the felt like this little scene deserved a separate home.


End file.
